Rejection is an Illusion

Who has the power to reject you? Isn't rejection a judgement? And who in this human world can judge? 

Unfortunately, we all do, belying what Jesus taught or tried to teach. Judging others seems to be second nature to us.

The question is why we do it.

Firstly, we build our own castles by bringing others down. For example, some public speakers comment adversely on their audience to make a point, thereby positioning themselves higher than the audience, so that the audience accepts their views without question.

Secondly, it sometimes helps to fit in the crowd. If 5 people we know don't like someone, we too pretend so that we may fit in and build a bond.

And sometimes it may just be a self defense mechanism, not to get close enough to someone so you don't get hurt, therefore we build a justification for that by a negative judgement.

Lastly, and this is a universal fact, we all have a perception that we are entitled. No. We are not. That's an illusion we have created about ourselves.

So when we reject someone, it's not really valid because the reasons for that rejection are totally one sided, selfish, illusionary and invalid. Similarly, when we stand rejected ( as we will be time and again) we must remember that our rejection too is an illusion built on some perception or threat.

That is exactly what happened to the woman apparently caught in adultery whom the Pharisees wanted to stone to death as per mosaic law. When confronted with their own sin, thier self perception of being keepers of the law broke as well, prompting them to abandon thier judgement.

But judging people is dangerous. It can be habit forming making. It can be disastrous for our professional and personal life. Politicians judge people who don't vote for them; company honchos can make suicidal decisions if they don't understand habits of some customers. The principle of success and successful relationships is to put ourselves in the other person's shoes helping us to understand rather than judge.

But to do that we need to think and that's something we don't do. Like Carl Jung said

“Thinking is difficult, that’s why most people judge.” 

Similarly, if someone has judged us, remember it's not us but they who need to prove something. When some says "oh he/she is an alcoholic and do not deserve to come here' they are actually saying - " I am a better person because I am not an alcoholic and therefore I deserve to be here'. They have made someone's alcoholism, or any other weakness, a steppingstone for themselves. Many times, people have used judgement as an excuse for rejection of any help to someone else and many, many times rejection is the path for self-survival. 

With this background, know that rejection will never change how much God loves each one of us. It will never touch his goodness, his mercy, or his kindness. It will never make God further away from us. He empathizes and it will not change His love. He enters our pain. 

And for the times we are tempted to judge and reject someone, always remember this verse from 
James 2:13- 
"13 For he shall have judgment without mercy, that hath shewed no mercy; and mercy rejoiceth against judgment."

But the greatest and most powerful assurance is the promise God has made to each one of us personally - 

“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!"

No. I believe I am God's child.